Friday, August 24, 2007

Fly Pie

I live in San Diego, where the weather is wonderful year-round. Hence the windows are always open. And the door usually stays open too to let in more light in and a bit more of a breeze. And Flies.

So I first noticed them about a month ago when my friend Jess came to visit me. We were starting to get buzzed by them, and so armed with rolled up Newspapers we had a fun time swatting flies. Jess is a Master Swatter. Perhaps we should have felt bad for murdering so many flies. They only live 24 hours anyway, so why not let them enjoy it? What can I say, we're cruel.

Unfortunately this is not the end of the story. August was an incredibly hot month, and they multiplied. I opened the door on Tuesday night and I was accosted by a Swarm of flies. It might have been funny, but there is nothing funny about walking across your carpet and having them hop out of the way. Not to mention the fact that I was showing the apartment to a potential roommate. Thankfully she was just as baffled as me, and assured me that there was nothing disgusting about the apartment and there was no reason for them to have invaded so completely. Jeff showed up right as I was setting a fly trap, and we attempted to swat as many as we could, but were thwarted by the sheer magnitude of their forces. I knew when we parted the curtain and they attacked us with all their might that a Weapon of Mass Destruction was required.

The next day I nuc-ed the hell out of those little suckers with Raid. Let me tell you that stuff is the BOMB! (pun fully intended) The horrible thing is that I could actually hear them screaming. One fly dying and crying out in pain can be ignored, but 10,000 Flies all crying out at the same time is really quite unsettling. But it was worth it when I opened the door and nothing moved.

So in memorandum for all the little fly souls I murdered in my quest for dominance over the ownership of the apartment, I am baking a pie.

How strange is it that everyone of my friends, when I told them I was going to make a Fly Pie, all asked, "You're not going to use real flies. .... Are you?" Of course not! I may be a Crazy Pie Lady, but I'm not that crazy!!!

I decided to make a Rum Raisin Apple Pie, which turned out very well, if I do say so myself. I'm always apprehensive about Apple Pie. It scares me a bit, but I thought this one was going to be great! As I'm assembling it, Schwartz leaned in and asked what I was planning on doing with the top of it. I honestly hadn't thought about it, but as usual, Schwartz had a plan. He mixed butter, cinnamon and a little bit of sugar together and piled it on top. It browned up so nicely, and I think, really made the pie! Thanks Schwartz!!

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